Saturday, July 31, 2010

A Writer's Plight

GA writer barnstar in

I dig deep within myself 
                 to write feelings that emerge.
I shout out words with my pen 
                 and hit paper with a surge.
Random times and days, 
                 I can not pick and choose.
It's, as if, someone takes my words, my thoughts.....and decides, 
                 in which way, they will be used.
Have you ever felt this way? Having no control?
                  Have you ever looked ahead....but, only seen the old?
I'm sure I'm not the only one who suffers from this plight.
                 As a writer, I admit, I only want to write.
Then what holds my hand away.....could it just be life? 

I know we all have times where we need to get things done, but just can't seem to accomplish what we set out to do. I have been beating myself up because I have let other parts of life come between me and my writing. The more I beat myself up the less I write. How do I stop the cycle?

Any comments or suggestions will be appreciated, friends :-)

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  1. Sometimes life does have to take the center stage, Cindy. All you can do is let it happen and, eventually, you will be hit with that desire to write that is so strong you can't stop even if you want to. THAT is when your writing will be what it should be. Hang in there. It will return because writers have to write.

  2. I know what you mean!
    I find committing to writing prompts like Magpie Tales helps, it means I write something from a visual prompt once a week - also bringing a small notebook with me everywhere - and giving myself goals that I stick on the fridge like "finish writing story by the 31st August" - maybe a writing group would be of support to you?

  3. I think you've answered your own question here: "The more I beat myself up, the less I write." I'd suggest two things. First, stop beating yourself up. You need a calm mind to find your way back to writing, not one riddled with guilt and despair. Be content in the moment, believe that you *will* be able to write again when you're ready, and your mind will clear.

    The second is, figure out why you feel *pressure* to write, and remove it from the equation. The only exception is if you're on deadline (not your own)...and unfortunately you may just have to muscle through that. But if it's *you* putting the pressure on yourself, take it off. If you feel the pressure to submit - write something to share for free. If you feel pressure to write something to share, let go of that and write something just for you.

    Do those two things...and I bet the words will start flowing again. :-)

  4. I love this!
    I go through dry spells where I sit and stare at the blank paper but eventually it starts to flow again.
    Don't beat yourself up. Set aside a bit of time each day and if the words don't come, then relax and think about ideas instead.

  5. Thanks Linda! Of course it makes perfect sense to keep the priorities straight. I just wish I didn't feel so guilty, either way. I wish I could be as patient with myself as you are with me. :-)

  6. Words A Day, you give me great ideas. And I know I've heard them before, way back when. Thank you so much for the thump on the head. Prompts are a great idea!

    Jamie, being 'content in the moment' has been a hard place for me to be lately. I know that contributes to my dilemma. But, I really don't have pressure except for that which I put upon myself. And I don't know where it's coming from. You are right, though. If I figure that out, much of my problem will be solved. Thank you!

  7. Thank you, Laura! I'm so happy you liked my poem. It's good to know that I'm not alone. I just need to switch gears when the words don't readily come to me, like you said, and do another writing related task. Awesome!

  8. My experience is like Linda's, Cindy. Many times in my life I've had to put the writing aside temporarily. When my parents, each in their turn, were ill and we knew they would soon leave, my time had to be spent caring for them. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself otherwise.

    But as Alex always reminds me, it's this very life experience that so enriches our writing. Our humanity comes through in our stories in a way it wouldn't if we were mere automatons, built only to write.

    Love and peace, and golden words to you, my friend.

  9. Donna, thank you so much for your very kind words. You and Alex both are so insightful. I know I will get over this bump in the road, it's just a matter of when. :-)Thank you for your support.

  10. Hi Cindy,

    I also agree with what Jamie said, guilts and the "shoulds" about writing or anything in life only makes you feel worse. It's easy to logically say that you won't beat yourself up for not writing, but be gentle and talk to your body too, sometimes it just takes some time to sink in not to beat yourself up. When it is right to write, you will feel it.

    If in the moment you are not writing, trust that what ever it is you are doing in that moment is right for you.

  11. I like this one, its exactly what i used to feel and you have put them out beautifully when i cant even decipher what the exact feeling let alone write about it.

  12. Patty, I can tell that you understand my thought of 'easier said than done'. But you are so right, in that, I have to be more gentle with myself. I am so grateful to have you and everyone here that commented, as my support group. Thank you so much!

  13. jay-me, I am glad I was able to put words to your feelings with this post. All of the comments have helped me, as well. I appreciate your comment. Thank you!